The Three Whys: A Strategy For Limitless Motivation
When I decided to start my first business and leave my career in journalism behind, there was a vision that played over and over in my mind.
In it, I’m watching my young son running in a school cross country race.
He’s running along on the overgrown grass and sees me on the sideline cheering him on.
A smile spreads across his face.
That’s it.
It might seem strange for that particular vision to be so intertwined with my decision to start a business.
I don’t even have a child yet. I might never have the fortune of being a father.
But let me explain.
In my mind, the school cross country event is on a weekday afternoon at a time I’d usually be working at my 9-5 job.
My ability to tell my imaginary son that I’ll be there to support him speaks to the freedom of starting my own business and being my own boss.
The huge smile on his face speaks to my desire to, one day, be a supportive and present father.
Somehow, that vision of my son smiling at me during his cross country race provides me with all the motivation I need to build my business.
There’s just no way that I’m letting that boy down.
The motivation myth
Motivation, or at least the way it is framed in the modern world, is something that you go looking for when it’s not there.
It’s a feeling that rises and falls with our energy levels or mood.
“I can’t find the motivation to do this…”
“I don’t feel motivated to do that…”
The myth of motivation is that it is fleeting.
But I think we’ve been approaching motivation from a limited perspective.
We equate it with willpower.
It’s something we struggle to summon in order to do whatever it is we want to do.
But motivation is deeper than that.
It has its roots in our purpose, in the things that give our lives meaning.
That’s why I think my non-existent son emerged as a driving force behind my decision to start a business.
If you can unearth your own deeper motivation – and marry it to your purpose – you’ll likely find that you won’t ever need to go looking for motivation again.
A strategy for limitless motivation
Upon looking at a few areas of my life that require some level of motivation, I noticed a pattern that had emerged organically.
I found that my motivation was multi-layered. It was almost as though my mind, or consciousness, had created its own fail-safe procedure.
The first time I noticed this was when I felt I was lacking motivation to go to the gym.
And so I asked myself: “Why do I go to the gym?”
I came back with three answers. Three whys.
- I want to be in good physical shape (I want to look good naked)
- I want to feel good (mental and physical wellbeing)
- I want to be able to play on the ground and play sports with my kids when I’m older
Whoa!.. Where did number 3 come from? Once again, I don’t have children.
But somehow, deep within me, the ability to be mobile, functional and fit enough to play with them was motivating me to go to the gym.
I could explore my motivations further. I’m sure I also want to be able to go hiking into old age, and I want to maintain physical strength to take care of things around the house.
But the three reasons why were the dominant motivators for me to go to the gym.
Let’s revisit the reasons why I started my own business.
- The freedom of being my own boss, which provides me with greater control over my time and energy
- The satisfaction of building a business and being responsible for my own income
- The ability to, one day, be a supportive and present father and partner
Do you notice how each layer of motivation is a separate line of defence?
This has led me to believe that true motivation is intrinsic. And when you discover your intrinsic motivation, it is limitless.
It is unbreakable.
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Why this approach to motivation works
I have found this approach to motivation to be remarkably effective.
It works because it starts by being honest with yourself.
You have to ask yourself “why” you do what you do.
If you find that you don’t have any convincing reasons why, or you only have one, you might want to consider removing that thing from your life.
However, if you can identify at least three compelling reasons why you do something, you will discover a deep well of motivation.
It’s not motivation you have to go looking for when you can’t find it.
You carry it with you at all times. It’s much more permanent than a feeling.
The reason this approach works is that it’s very unlikely that all three reasons why will fail you at the same time.
There are days when being my own boss feels like more trouble than it’s worth and I have very little control over my time and energy.
There are days when I feel like giving up and my income isn’t what I’d like it to be.
But that final layer of motivation always catches me. My desire to be a supportive and present partner and, one day, father is so deeply entrenched within me that, no matter how worn down I feel, it motivates me to keep going.
How to apply this motivation strategy in your life
I don’t know where the vision of my hypothetical son running in a cross country race comes from.
I was single when I started my business and the prospect of being a father seemed far away.
But that vision lived somewhere deep within me.
I didn’t go searching for it, it simply appeared when I started thinking about starting a business.
We all have these deep-rooted visions and ideas of how we want our lives to be.
Sometimes we smother them with surface-level desires. But they’re still there.
I encourage you to search yourself for them.
Surface-level desires are important, too. In both of the examples I’ve provided, my first two layers of motivation are closer to the surface than the third.
Sometimes surface-level motivation is all we need.
But knowing your deepest why gives you a sense of purpose to hold on to when you feel like letting go.
The Three Whys
You can apply this strategy to anything you do, but you should start with things that are important to you or take up a significant amount of your time and energy.
Things like:
- Your job or business
- School or study
- Side projects
- Physical activity/exercise
- Relationships
- Healthy eating
- Meditation practice (or any other habit you want to establish)
Start by asking yourself this simple question: “Why do I do X?”
Spend some time waiting for the answers. Try to imagine the world you want to create by doing X. You might even have visions like I had.
Write them all down.
Then rank them from the most surface-level reason why to the deepest reason why.
Narrow them down to your Three Whys.
- A surface level reason why
- A mid-level reason why
- The deepest reason why
Make sure your Three Whys are embedded in your mind.
If you can do that, you should never find yourself short of motivation again.
