#013 How to Find True Balance, What’s Your Purpose? + Morning ☀️
Hey, friends. Welcome to The Now newsletter.
The theme of cycles and seasons has been very present for me lately.
It was the study topic for my Men’s Circle this week, it’s been cropping up in podcasts I’m listening to, and it’s something my partner and I have been talking about a lot.
Here in New Zealand, we’re also transitioning from autumn to winter, so change is in the air.
When I sat down to start the newsletter this week, I had no idea what I would write about.
I simply sat down and this is what came out (it must have been bubbling away under the surface).
This edition of the newsletter comes “straight from the top of my dome” and into your inbox.
I’d love to hear what you think of my thoughts about balance and cycles (just reply to this email).
As always, thank you all for being here 🙏
— Jonathan
💡 One Mind-Expanding Idea: The Cycle of Balance
“So be sure when you step, Step with care and great tact. And remember that life’s a great balancing act. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed).” — Dr. Seuss, Oh! The Places You’ll Go
Balance.
It’s the thing so many of us strive for.
But what if we’ve been thinking about balance wrong?
Balance is typically depicted as a pair of perfectly weighted scales.
This tells us balance is achieved by carefully stacking weights on each scale to keep it level.
Think about how this plays out in real life.
The classic example is work-life balance.
“If I spend 50 hours working during the week, I must balance it out with 50 hours of living.”
What does that even mean?
Or how about stress-calm balance.
“If I can just stack enough meditation and yoga on one scale, then maybe, just maybe, I can offset all the stress I’ve accumulated this week.”
Or here’s another doozie.
“I’m pretty sure if I triple-stack a green juice, tofu salad and a HIIT workout this morning, then I can load up on burgers and beers tonight.”
We make these micro justifications in our minds all the time in service to this idea of balance.
Not only is this approach to balance confusing, exhausting and, ultimately, futile.
It’s also pretty f*cking boring.
Balance isn’t achieved by carefully stacking weights like a game of Jenga, hoping the next move you make doesn’t cause your life to fall to pieces.
Balance is achieved by honouring cycles.
Where I’m living, in New Zealand, it’s currently late autumn.
It’s getting darker earlier. It’s cooling down. There’s more rain. The trees outside are shedding their leaves.
If I were to zoom in on one day in late autumn, it would look awfully out of balance.
Too cold. Too dark. Too wet and windy.
But if I were to zoom out and look at the seasonal cycle over the course of a year (the 365-day cycle of the earth revolving around the sun), I would see that one day in autumn is appropriately counterbalanced by the other 364 days around it.
Nature is composed of, and governed by, cycles like this.
And somehow, over the course of billions of years and untold catastrophes, nature always returns to a state of balance.
As part of nature, we are also living under the influence of cycles.
The body has an internal clock that synchs with the rhythms of the world around us.
If you can attune to the cycles within your life — your circadian rhythm, energy cycle, ultradian rhythm, lunar cycle, menstrual cycle, circannual cycle — you may discover a more natural way to balance.
The seasons simply flow. The moon moves through its phases. The tide rises and recedes.
We, too, go through seasons, phases and times of activity and rest.
Stacking weights on scales might help you feel some semblance of control in our volatile world.
But often this rigid, disciplined approach to balance, clashes with your natural rhythms, causing further imbalance.
You aren’t your beholden to your scheduling app, to-do list, or even your goals.
You are made to flow with your seasons.
You are made for prolonged periods of darkness and stillness and times of vitality and productivity.
You are made for short bursts of deep focus and moments of mindless daydreaming.
You are made for years of knowing what you want, and a second in which you suddenly change your mind.
“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.” — Ecclesiastes 3:1-4
If you feel out of balance today, zoom out. Zoom out further and see this day is part of a season.
In the messy momentum of fluid cycles and the booming drum of nature’s rhythms, balance is not a mathematical problem to be solved.
Balance is a dance.
If you listen carefully, you’ll hear the music.
🔗 One Curiosity-Igniting Link: What’s Your Purpose?
What is my purpose?
It’s a question almost all of us grapple with throughout our lives.
This video by Green Renaissance explores this idea from the perspectives of four “ordinary people doing extraordinary things”.
I’ve watched dozens of videos by Green Renaissance over the years and they’re always inspiring in an honest, understated way.
It was difficult to choose only one to share, but this is one of my favourites — a short compilation of conversations around the theme of “doing what you love”.
I recommend popping over to YouTube and subscribing to this channel if you haven’t already.
🔥 One Life-Altering Practice: Morning Sunlight
I’m including this practice this week as it’s a great way to start synching your life with the rhythms of nature.
Viewing sunlight as soon as you can after waking has many health benefits, according to Dr. Andrew Huberman, including:
- Increases early-day cortisol release (optimal time for elevated cortisol)
- Prepares the body for sleep that night
- Supports immune system function
- Boosts your metabolism
- Improves focus
- Regulates your circadian clock
It’s a super simple practice. Just head outside as soon as you can after waking and expose your eyes to sunlight for 10-15 minutes.
I’ve been doing this most days for the past year or more (I usually just go for a walk at the beach by my house) and I find it’s a great way to kickstart the day.
Even if it’s overcast, you’ll still get most of the benefits.
It’s one of those things where the bar is so low and the potential benefits are so significant, that it just makes sense to do it.
At the very least, you’ll get the benefits of going for a short walk in the morning.
That’s it for this edition. I hope you can bring more awareness to the cycles and seasons in your life this week.
A quick reminder that my free Nervous System Fundamentals course is available for anyone who wants to learn the basics of nervous system regulation, Polyvagal Theory, breathwork and more.
Thanks for reading,
— Jonathan